I'm starting to "feel" like I need me time. As in a moment of silence. Where I don't have to worry about anything or anybody. No child , no family, no relationship , no bills , no work. If I can catch something as simple as one second I will be a happy person ! Don't get me wrong those are the things I enjoy , those are the things that keep me moving but there comes a point where it all becomes so overwhelming. Its like I find myself catering to everything and everyone but self. Those individuals involved may not see it that way because I may not be spending every waking second on one particular person but I can honestly say I'm spread pretty thin!
The topic of sex in my life is a complicated one but at the same time not so complicated to me just everyone else. I believe sex should always be enjoyable and with the one you love yada yada yada. But... For a female sex is first and foremost emotional... Unless you were like me 6 years ago then it was about control stemming from emotional and physical abuse that occurred years before. So anyway Sex is emotional and I lost my train of thought. I think that was my point.
You can't just expect "me" or "us" to be ready to go any moment even if I am physically attracted to you. It's nothing personal but I know for myself I need to be mentally fed as well. I need the "knows".
To know: I'm safe, wanted, acknowledged, appreciated, respected, not just an item, or as if it's a requirement of a relationship (because it's not).
I love what's in my life right now I do. And I'm more then ranting but so what it's my blog and for my use!
Im not sure about some things and other things I am.but that's the beauty of being me and true to self. I will never be the person that gets lost in someone else and loses every part of their beautiful being simply because I refuse to. And I don't ever want to be with someone who became "me" and lost them self. Thats the death of a relationship .
Good night good day!
No comments:
Post a Comment