I'll take the blame.
That was way to easy but I'll take that blame.
I'll say what no one else wanted to say and I'll go through the pain.
I'll take the blame

Rebound girl

She's the one that was there for you when she thought It was over way before it actually ended.
She cared , she loved,
She gave some what of her all,
Then months into it she finds that really its not over,
The shit you guys had or rather still have its not over,
It never was,
Conversations of keeping it real,
We're just that,
Conversations.
Never converted into actions,
She's your rebound chic,
The one that makes you feel good when the going gets tough,
The one who in her head was thinking the efforts were going towards a happy ending,
But rather being deposited into a bankrupt bank,
Shes everything you want but truly can't have,
She's your rebound chic,
The lies and the good times,
Living in a happy fantasy,
Never facing the unhappy moments,
The things that hurt us,
Because its not a true relationship,
She's your rebound chic,
Looking good on your arm,
And when it's all said and done you throw her away,
Your her go,
Lead her to believe that long term was a possibility,
And following through was never your responsibility,
She's your rebound chic,
And she never realized it.
Until now.
Her heart has been crushed and her feelings depleted,
Over it all!
Now let's just have fun

Acts of betrayal

There are those moments in life when your heart jumps. That moment when you remember such hurtful things. The time when the person you love lied or said hurtful things.
Forgiveness isn't everything it should be the memory that we should be able to erase. Because those little moments carry on forever. They take constant effort to keep pushing it to the back of your mind. To push a smile through.
Because honestly you'll always wish it never happened and once it does , it changes something inside of you. The way you see that person.You can no longer see them the same.
But in some crazy way I think there are benefits from such situations. Those little lies, actions of betrayal. They bring you back to reality. They bring your head out of the clouds from beyond lovers land and make you see that person for who they truly are minus the tinted shades. You get to see that person for the flawed human being that we all are.
What comes into question is....
Do I love you that much to see beyond those flaws?
Is our love that strong that we still progress into a greater love?
Am I strong enough within myself to keep from acting in the same manner?

Catering to self

My issue isn't with people. It's with me staying true to myself. I seem to get derailed at my most vulnerable moments. I love hard which is a positive and a negative.
I'm always choosing to take care of everyone but myself, because that's what I enjoy doing. But reality is I've got to come first. I need to make sure I'm well taken care of first and foremost. Then everything else will fall into place.
It's about me these days and how I feel and the direction I want to take my life in. Can't cater to anyone else before I cater to self!

I want to be the best me that I can possibly be!

?

This is what it is.. No blinders no nothing.. True self..
The question is? Do I see myself in it for the long run? Are these the qualities that I've written? Are these the faults that I'm willing to love? What's my limit? What's the deal breaker?
But is it true self? Am I blinded ?
To hell with it all
You take risk in life right?
You gamble on a good game.
You live it like it's your last and if it ain't you live to the next and proceed to live that as if it's your last.
Taking chances is never what it's cracked up to be.. First you get the adrenaline rush , the infatuation, the lust of love , and even true love. Then you wonder , you fear, you question..
Is this what we really want? Can we make it past the I got to know you part? Am I really ready to completely trust you %100 or am I capable of trusting %100?
If I question a move is that a deduction from my overall percentage?
These feelings I have right now can I constantly suppress them or will they eventually , forcefully explode?
The questions I have can they ever be received as a positive experience?
Damn relationships! Or what ever we call it these days..
Am I ready for it?
Do I want it?
The more we wait the more the scale tips to the other side..
Someone's always wanting more then the other.. Can that ever be fixed?
Can there ever be a true happy balance? Or does that one that wants
It more eventually fall off? Do the
Scales tip so low that the imbalance is inevitable?

Not sure..

I’m so sure about allot of things, like how I want to raise my child and the fact that I need succeed in life. But I’m unsure about allot more. I think I’m just tired of not knowing. Not knowing where my life is going to end up. What’s up ahead. I have this vision of what it should’ve been but in no way am I on that path. I’m a big ball of what if’s and possibilities. Rolling down a road unknown, a bit out of control. I have writers block in my book of life. But I’m not complaining I’m releasing. Because in no way will this hinder the process. ‘Something will be done.